Couple hosts birthday party at restaurant they own, charge all their friends full price and profit over $5000 from them: 'Most couples ended up paying around $350'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Apr 17, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

It's a general rule that if you host, you pay. Of course, if you're specifying in your invitation that you expect everyone to chip in, that's okay. Then they have all the information they need to decide whether or not they're going to come. You can't force your friends to spend money on you, that's crazy. This is even true if it's your birthday. Maybe a friend offers to take you out, and then in that case it's clear who is expected to pay. But if you're throwing a birthday dinner, you need to be the one to throw down your card. 

It's also a general rule that if you own a restaurant and your friends come, you should probably throw them a free dessert or glass of champagne. You don't have to, but it's a great way to keep your returning customers happy. Most restaurants build this into their budget since it's good marketing. 

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  • 01
    EAD HAPPY Bothaley
    via Mario Verduzco

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The couple in this story didn't understand either of these general rules. They owned a restaurant but didn't comp anything. And they hosted a birthday party and then sent out individual bills. So needless to say their friends wanted to keep their distance. Read on for the full story and see what you would have done. 

  • 02

    AITA for being annoyed that my friends charged everyone full price at their "birthday party" at their own restaurant?

    So recently, I (30F) attended a birthday party for a friend. The couple hosting it (let's call them Megan & Dave) own a popular restaurant in town, and they invited about 40 people to celebrate Megan's birthday there. They closed the restaurant for the night just for the event, so it was a private party with only their invited guests.
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
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    At the beginning of the night, Dave made a birthday toast and said something along the lines of, "Thank you all for being here to celebrate Megan - order whatever you want!" So everyone kind of assumed it was being hosted, or at the very least subsidized. Nobody expected a free night necessarily, but the vibe was definitely "you're invited to celebrate with us," not "this is a group dinner and you're footing your own bill."
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
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    Well... fast forward to the end of the night, servers started bringing around individual cheques. Turns out everyone was charged full price — food, drinks, everything. - Most couples ended up paying around $350 for the night, some more, some less.
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
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    People were really thrown off. The way it was presented made it seem like we were guests at a party, not customers at a business. Megan & Dave are not hurting financially - they just built a brand new home, drive luxury cars and take vacations.
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
  • 06
    From what we can tell, they profited around $5,000 from the night — off of their closest - friends. Since then, a lot of us have been keeping our distance. It just felt super icky, like we were tricked into attending what was actually a cash-grab dinner disguised as a party.
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
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    Now Megan is confused why people are being distant, and I'm starting to wonder - AITA for being annoyed and not really wanting to hang out with them anymore?
    via u/Quick_Aioli6466
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    Cheezburger Image 10494702336
    via Unsplash+ (Nappy)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09

    Commenters agreed that this behavior seemed scammy.

    M.. 32m ago Edited 30m ago • LOL.. So they basically scammed. you all into paying for their birthday party and even made a profit from the con? Those con artists aren't anybodys friends
    via u/Mother_Search3350
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    You all will be complete AH'S and idiots if you keep them in your circle of friends after they literally stole a whole dinner bill plus 5K from you
    via u/Mother_Search3350
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    Salty_Thing3144 34m ago • NTA! If you invite someone to a party, the understanding is that the host pays! They tricked you and ambushed you. I would end the friendship over this.
    via u/Salty_Thing3144
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    . Grumpy_Lurker 31m ago NTA. They invited you to a birthday party and profited off the event. I wouldn't want to socialize with them, either.
    via u/Grumpy_Lurker
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    ElowenThornevale 31m ago Nah you're not wrong. If you're making bank and inviting friends to your birthday at your restaurant, at least comp something. Charging full price is wild.
    via u/ElowenThornevale
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    judging • 28m ago NTA - I would assume that someone who owns a restaurant, is having their bday at their own restaurant, and who says "order whatever you want" would be paying for it. I mean if not, then why announce to order whatever you want? No sh sherlock I can order whatever I want if I'm paying for it, like was the point in saying that.
    via u/judging******
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    MarthaT001 • 31m ago NTA Wow, you have some really tacky ex-friends.
    via u/MarthaT001
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    Alarming_Poem_... • 30m ago NTA. Whether you own the restaurant or not, the general assumption is that the person inviting everyone covers the cost unless they specify otherwise in the invite. It's even tackier that it's their OWN RESTAURANT and their own party and they can't foot the bill. This is crazy behavior and insanely r de.
    via u/Alarming_Poem_7343
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    ncjr591 • 28m ago It happened to my son, his friend's parents invited all the friends out for a birthday dinner, ordered appetizers and anything off the menu they wanted. When it was done they were expected to divide up the bill. It was the last time he celebrated with him. It cost me 150 bucks, because my son at the time was only 17. If I knew the parents I would have called them out.
    via u/ncjr591
  • 18
    changelingcd • 21m ago NTA. They charged you full price in a restaurant they OWN, at a birthday event that started with 'order whatever you want'? Yep, you were all scammed. All the guests. should tell them clearly and loudly they were deceitful scumbags, and not accept any "misunderstanding' bulls excuses. They knew exactly what they were doing from the start.
    via u/changelingcd
  • 19
    tigerz0973 .26m ago So it wasn't really an invite to a party it was an invite to be robbed blind. necks they have some brass
    via u/tigerz0973
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    DBFool2019 • 26m ago NTA. The couple took advantage of all of their friends. I'm assuming people brought gifts for her as well? These are two very self-absorbed people.
    via u/DBFool2019
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    Tight_Jaguar_3881 • 23m ago This happened to me over 40 years ago and I am still mad about it. It is so tacky to do that. It is different from explaining before that one is expected to pay. I felt ambushed. I was the designated driver for our group so did not drink but had to pay for others drinking.
    via u/Tight_Jaguar_3881
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    . Material_Cellist4... 22m ago NTA But someone needs to tell them what they did wasn't okay. They should have been upfront about everything,
    via u/Material_Cellist4133
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    buttpickles99 · 17m ago NTA - I would have walked out without paying. They are not friends, friends don't take advantage of people like that. Good riddance
    via u/buttpickles99
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    Quiet_Village_1425 23m ago . NTA. What a low ball move from your acquaintances. Lesson learned never attend a party hosted by them at business or home. Scandalous. Yes tell her the truth since they lack emotional intelligence to see it for themselves.
    via u/Quiet_Village_1425
  • 25
    Mela777 16m ago NTA, but if you want to address Megan's bewilderment, you could explain that when someone invites you to a party and then tells the guests to order whatever they'd like, the vibe is definitely "it's on us." The best etiquette practice would
    via u/Mela777
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    have been to make it very clear when the invitations were issued that the guests would have to pay for their own food and drinks, and at the very least it should have been disclosed before anyone ordered. Megan and her husband threw her a party and then sprang the bill on
    via u/Mela777
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    the guests with no warning. That's poor communication at best, but given that they own the place and seem to be doing well, it feels like they were taking advantage of their friends so as to not lose all the income from closing down for her party.
    via u/Mela777
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    Longjumping Tone... • 17m ago The only way you the AH is if you don't post this story as a Yelp review. This is crazy. Sounds like your birthday present was a 5 grand night.
    via u/LongjumpingTone3544
  • 29
    No_Glove_1575 16m ago . NTA. It's common sense that when you HOST a party for yourself at your own place of business or residence, it's on you. The "order what ever you want" line was the nail in the coffin for me. You don't need these people as friends!
    via u/No_Glove_1575

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